Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Confession Time: Stepping Back and Regrouping

So, my father died in 2013 and ever since then I felt like my life has been spinning out of control. I am at a new age, I am 35 and the things I used to enjoy are no longer enjoyable. And I am talking about food and certain people's company.

I started a journey back in 2010--to lose weight and keep it off. I was able to drop 60 pounds and never thought I'd see that fat person again. I was probably the happiest I've ever been in 2012, and then 2013 came and boom--all of that out the window.

Well, fast forward six years later: I've gained back at least 25 pounds of what I've lost and I am feeling defeated. Most of it came from stress, my husband lost his brother last year and his mother terrorized us the entire year--clearly not taking it well, but it didn't stop her from harassing us afterwards and just being downright mean, disgusting and everything wrong with a monser in law from hell.

Breathes in and out: woo sa.

Okay, I am not a mean girl, so I don't get along with mean people.

Now, I am not trying to blame anyone for my 25 pound weight gain, but stress from my dad's death and stress from my husband losing his brother has weighed seriously heavy on me and I have had enough--again.

I am taking back full control. I am going to start meditating again, doing Zumba in the afternoon, walking, drinking more water and just regrouping my thoughts and getting back to that happy place I once was.

I will no longer use "sweets," as a way to escape the pain that I keep buried inside. It's not like I feel great eating it, so why torture myself?

In all honesty, I have always had a problem with my weight. Since day one, I've been on a yo-yo diet for years and I really thought this time I would never be fat again. So goodbye weight gain, and hello to weightloss--my old friend--the one I miss . . . the most.


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